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Dec 18, 2014

The Great Divide: League Enacts "Two Year Plan" To Breathe New Life Into Tournament

MBA HEADQUARTERS – NEW YORK, NY

As previously announced, the Mediocre Bowling Association has decided to give the league’s December event, The Great Divide, a facelift. This wheels of this “2 season plan” will begin to turn on Sunday at the 2014 tournament.

 The Great Divide, historically, has always been an event that was panned and critiqued by both members and fans of the league. Was it too predictable? Was it too unfair? “Yes” was the answer given by someone who refused to be identified as a traitor to the league. Let’s explore the brief history of this controversial tournament:

 December 2012 – The league and all tournaments are making their world debut. Las Vegas is pretty quiet usually because they aren’t spending the same money on bets with the holidays. At this time in the league, the (only) Staten Island chapter has very few women to place on one team. MBA brass decides to even out the sides by placing two men at random to play with the women. Complimentary pigtails are provided, but promptly turned down. The men would soundly win the tournament 1480 to 1156.

 December 2013 – Hearing some outcry, the scoring would change from total points to a team average, hence eliminating the need to send genders to other teams in case of lopsidedness. Even with the women’s team holding an 13 to 11 edge in players over their opponent, the men would walk away with the Majestic Cup for the second year in a row with a 134.5 average.

70% of the reason why this tournament will be transformed

Jessica Arvelo says hello to camera during the 2013 Great Divide, and to her fellow members above

During the offseason, the MBA brass and league officials decided to change the rules this year and split players into PAIRS, with the best player in the chapter paired with the worst. The second best would be paired with the second worst, and so on. To go along with this ruling, any player who has yet to participate in any event so far this season, will be in a pool amongst themselves to be paired up. Also, if in either pool there is an odd player left over, their score will simply be doubled as they play for the championship solo.

A leaked photo of next year's Great Divide trophies 

The Majestic Cup, which has proudly been displayed by both of the men’s championship teams, will finally be taken home by the winner(s). The exit of the Majestic Cup will pave the way for two smaller, but just as impressive trophies to be handed to the winner(s) during the 2015 event. More importantly, the league will no longer have to store the trophy in its office (parent’s basement.)

 We take feedback seriously here at the MBA and we never forget, that we could definitely do all of this without you. Happy Holidays!

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